Cell Phone Bans Don't Work? Try Duct Tape

January 31, 2010
A new study by the Highway Loss Data Institute indicates that laws preventing motorists from texting or using handheld cell phones while driving haven't led to a large drop in the number of vehicle crashes. While the findings are questionable, let's say, for the sake of argument, that they're true.

So if bans on texting and handheld phones don't work, what's the next step? Two words: Duct tape.

We're all aware that duct tape has 101 valuable uses, and probably a lot more. Its potential as a transportation safety tool has yet to be tested, however. It's time we gave it a test drive.

I propose a federal law requiring all drivers and passengers to apply a thick strip of duct tape to their mouths upon entering a vehicle. No one could speak, of course, and the safety benefits of this simple procedure would be enormous.

Though only a partial solution, duct tape would prevent many distractions that plague drivers and lead to vehicle accidents.

Benefits of the mandatory Duct Tape Law include:

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